Tuesday, November 15, 2011

I Love Burritos... I Mean My Wife


I have been preaching through Paul’s letter to the Ephesians this fall.  We started eight weeks ago, and have just now finished chapter one.  As you can see, there’s no rush to finish.  I just don’t want to miss any of the wonderful truths found in this important letter.  One of those important truths can be found in Ephesians 1:15.  In this verse, Paul indicates that he has noticed two significant characteristics about his readers.  1) They had faith in Christ, and 2) they showed love to men.  It is this second characteristic that I want to spend a few moments dwelling on.

Paul says he has heard about his readers love for others.  But what exactly does that mean.  Here’s why I pose the question.  In the English language, we use the word love in a very ambiguous way.  I love watching Star Trek, I love burritos, and I love my wife.  Do I really love Star Trek and burritos as much as I love my wife?  Of course not!  I definitely love burritos more…. JUST KIDDING!  Apart from God, I love my wife far more than anything else in my life. Yet, I’m as guilty of carelessly tossing the word “love” around as the next person.

In the original Greek, there are four different words for love.  There is erotic, sexual, love (eros); there is the brotherly love (phileo) expressed towards friends; there is the love expressed towards family (storgeo); and there is the unconditional love (agape) that was first expressed by God through the cross.  When Paul uses the word love, he uses the word agape.  Essentially, Paul heard his readers were showing unconditional love to their fellow men.

Unconditional love. That doesn’t seem too hard, right? Yet, is our love really unconditional?  I was recently challenged by a thought shared by Alex Kendrick in his book The Love Dare.  Kendrick suggests that when we explain why we love our husband or wife, we often identify qualities and characteristics about our spouse.  For example, they are beautiful, a good provider, a good mother or father, etc.  Kendrick then poses a question that captured my undivided attention.  He asks, “But what if over the course of years, your wife or husband stopped being every one of these things.  Would you still love them?”

My first reaction to his question is “yes,” of course I would continue to love my wife; but Kendrick quickly reminds his reader that based on the reasons we love our spouse, the answer would logically have to be “no.” 

“If the reasons for loving your spouse all have something to do with his or her qualities – and then those same qualities suddenly or gradually disappear – your basis for love is over” (46).   

This concept should cause each of us to stop and reflect on why we love the people in our life. For love to be truly unconditional, it cannot be based on “the one being loved, but by the one choosing to love.”  This is why God’s love is unconditional.  If God’s love was based on my efforts, there are times when I would not be lovable.   

Fortunately for me (and for all of us), God decided in advance (he chose) to include us in his family as sons and daughters.  He demonstrated his love through the grace given us by his son, Jesus, whose redeeming blood has pardoned our sins that we might be set aside for his glory as we give our best for him (Ephesians 1:4-7).  It is because he first loved me that I am able to love anyone at all, let alone unconditionally (1 John 4:19); and even then, only after I have accepted his love into my life.

How do you love?  Are there people in your life that are hard to love?  It’s ok to admit it.  You wouldn’t be human if there weren’t.  But, why are they hard to love?  Is it because you have qualified your love for those people?  What would your life be like if you chose to love those people simply because God loves you?  What would our communities look like if churches were filled with people who chose to love others simply because God loved us first?  What would our world look like if entire communities chose to love other communities simply because God loved us first? 

The answer is simple.  Our world would be much closer to the way God originally intended it to be.  That, in my opinion, would be a goal worth achieving!

Until next time…

David

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